Resident Evil

I think Resident Evil was good. I enjoyed the first 3rd. But after the scene in the RV where he walks away and says “I like kids.” Or something like that, thats when it really started to wane on me. The main character constantly mumbling to himself. At first I played it off as oh this is kinda how someone playing the game would talk to themselves during a first playthrough and I kinda liked that idea. But it doesn’t give the movie any room breath. The first half is beautifully shot, the snow with the deep black darkness in the background, mostly lit by car lights looks great. Him going into the house and shooting the woman as the camera pans across the floor is great.

As the two bodies form together though, the main characters sits and watches literally saying “Interesting.” as it happens. He constantly sucked me out of the movie. But I could deal with it fine enough, until he meets the two people who work for Umbrella. That whole sequence, I think is legitimately horrible. The fat guy looking at the camera and saying, “Have you heard of Umbrella?” Before explaining everything was awful. Then the main character trying to load a gun in the van for way to long wasn’t funny. The fat guy honking the horn wasn’t funny, I hated that whole part.

Resident Evil is a goofy series, its funny when its being earnestly cheesy. But there was just to many attempts at humor that didn’t work for me. I heard the orginal cut had even more jokes but they cut them. I can’t imagine how bad that version was. I honestly want to recut the movie and remove a lot of him mumbling to and see if it improves it. The final nail in the coffin for me was the lab scene. The way the doctors bumble around with the antidote was dog shit. It felt like Zach told them to act like they were in a pitch black room or something. That final sequence felt like a bad SNL sketch.